Hi! I hope you are having a great week! I am busy trying to wrap my head around planning a wedding along with my son, future daughter-in-law and her family. Since this is our first wedding I am unsure about current wedding etiquette so I’ve turned to THE professional. Emily Post!
In preparation for the wedding, I started researching books specifically on wedding etiquette and organization. We have the next 9 months and 20 some odd days to plan. I looked on Amazon and found the Emily Post books got great reviews. So I ended up ordering the Wedding Planner for Moms and Emily Post’s Wedding Etiquette, 6th Edition.
I started reading the 6th edition “Emily Post’s Wedding Etiquette” book yesterday. (By Anna & Lizzie Post)
It started me thinking why 6 editions? Have manners changed THAT much since the first edition? Emily Post published her first etiquette book in 1922. Now I want to find the original book so I can compare notes, just out of curiosity. But, this one does have some great information! And it should cover most everything in its nearly 400 pages.
One thing I learned is you can be invited to an engagement party and are not expected to bring a gift. The party is a celebration of the exciting news and an opportunity to toast the future bride and groom. Also, if you are invited to the engagement party you may or may not be invited to the wedding. I didn’t know that!
Another thing I’ve learned is you do not include registry information ON the shower invitation. That information can be included in the shower invitation, but on a separate piece of paper.
(I thought that was the exact point of the shower, but Emily says no.) Separate piece of paper. Also, if you are invited to a shower, you can expect to be invited to the wedding. Further more, if you are invited to more than one shower, you aren’t expected to bring a gift to each one. (But who would show up empty handed to a shower? That seems contrary to etiquette if you ask me.)
As far as the wedding invitations go, the book provides lots of information on wording and timing. Such as how to word the invitations and how far in advance to mail them. And the wedding invitations should not contain any registry information at all. The invitation’s single purpose is to invite those special people and to share information about the important day. I know so many things have changed over the years. I’ve seen wedding and shower invitations done so many ways so probably nothing is “wrong”. But, we are doing this once so we want to make sure we respect tradition and not forget anything! So, we have lots more reading and research to do! And lots of to-do lists!
Another thing this book includes is dealing with current technology and how to integrate it (and social media) into the wedding planning and the big day. Something my son and his fiancé did that I thought was clever was to create a shared photo page (in the Cloud) where we can share inspiration pictures and ideas. I never would have thought of that! So now we can share pictures from magazines, or Pinterest.
I also bought Emily Post’s Wedding Planner for Moms. This book is chock full of information and includes “copy-ready” pages to keep track of guest lists, dates, gifts, showers, expenses, etc.
This is great but I have one suggestion. I would like to have this book in a 3 ring binder form so I could copy the pages and insert them into the book. Knowing me I will lose one of the pages if it’s not attached. The book my future daughter in law purchased is called “The Wedding Planner& Organizer” by Mindy Weiss and it IS a 3-ring binder. Perfect! Maybe I’ll make my own….
So, we are all SO excited for this wedding and all of the fun year-long festivities to come! When I learn something new I call my sister and report my newly acquired findings. She’s started jokingly calling me Emily. I wish! I’ll try to make her proud. <3
“Good manners reflect something from inside-an innate sense of consideration for others and respect for self.”-Emily Post